Space Elevator

An interesting problem with building bridges into space  relates to time. Objects that move through space and different speeds have different time. So I we build something that reached from the Earth’s surface all the way into orbit it would be warped in strange ways. I wonder, could such a structure even be constructed? I’d like to think so. In  any case it would be hard to accomplish.

Anthropomorphic

Every few thousand years God comes down from the sky to host a crazy competition to decide who gets superpowers. The next one is this year, 2012. Time for some EXTREME challenges. Check it out, there he is now, our host God. He’s flying out of the sky on a jet ski. Look at that beard, it’s out of control.

Alright, the contenstants have been selected and the competition is about to start. God has selected several interesting challenges today. The first is pretty gruesome. He calls it nightmare plague insanity scavenger hunt extravaganza. In this challenge the contestants have to swim through a maze filled with whatever they are most scared of. I don’t think I can watch.

God is calling the next challenge impossible riddle quandary mania mayhem. In this challenge God will ask a series of questions that are really hard. Hopefully there are a few savants amongst the challengers.

God is calling the last challenge, what? Is this for real? He says the last challenge is called wii compete. God has selected his favorite wii games for the challengers to compete against eachother with.

Well it seems we have a winner. What’s this, the challenger has challenged God to wii. Madness. Utter and complete Madness.

Incredible, the score was tied almost the entire time but a winner has finally pulled ahead. God is still the reigning champion of the universe at wii. What’s this, the challenger was in disguise. The challenger was really Lucifer this whole time. God’s little brother. Oh my goodness, they’re going in for a bro hug. I don’t believe it. After thousands of years, God and the Lucifer have finally made up. This is a beautiful moment that we’ve witnessed here today. I think I’m tearing up a little. It looks like God and Lucifer have had an idea of some kind. What are they doing? They’ve just given superpowers to all of humanity. This is crazy folks. I can feel energy flowing through me. I’m so connected with the universe. Everything is totally awesome. I can fly and stuff. Wow. What a day!