Afraid of the Dark at Age 33

I am 33 years of age. My nights are riddled with distress.
There is hairy creature that lives under my bed and clutches at my ankles if I attempt an expedition to the lavatory. There is a spotted naked man with unnaturally large and red eyes who watches me from my closet. There are living shadows on the lawn outside my window that dance and spin madly whispering my name. There is black sloth that hangs from my ceiling fan who says obscene things to me. There is a giant insect in the corner of the room who eats socks and house gnomes. The gnomes scream in agony all night long. 

I tried leaving the light on, but they always turn it out. I tried to ask them to leave, but there eyes began to glow. I tried to sleep in other places, but they followed me. I tried to phone my relatives, but the phones were all dead. I tried to bribe them, but they already took whatever they pleased. I tried to fumigate, but the gnomes cried desperately in protest. I would like to fight them, but I fear they would kill me. I know they would kill me. I have tried everything I can think of. There is nothing I can do.

They are becoming agitated. They are becoming bored. They are becoming unhappy. They are becoming bitter. They are becoming hungry. I can feel their hatred feeling my room. They despise me. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do. They will kill me for sure. Oh, God! What should I do?