Cuzzin’ Jimmy

They rushed Jimmy into the tub. The warts all over his body looked as if they were about to burst. Aunt Sue tore off the poor boy’s clothes and told Ma to start making a compleecated concocktshin. They rubbed it all over Jimmy’s body. It looked like it might’ve helped some.

That night, I waked up to Jimmy whiperin’ in my ear. Somthin’ astrange is hapnin’ me Cuz. Follow me.

He took out back in the yard and pulled up his shirt. He got glowy bumps all o’er his belly. The moon was big and high. I could see that round thing that done started all this madness still smolderin out in the corn field. I don’t like the looks uh this Jimmy. Somethin’ aint right here. I lowered my voice. This looks like the devil’s work, you ask me. Jimmy? says I, I think you gots the Devil insides yoo.

Nah, Cuz. I’m fine. B’sides, lookit what I can do. Jimmy put his hands to his head and scrunched his face up funny. I looked over at the windmill. It was twistin and shakin like it had fleas or some’m. There was a loud creak as the windmill blades busted offa the tower and started flyin’ around like some sorta helleecopter. The blades hovered just above Jimmy’s head. Jimmy looked over at me laughin’ as he reached up ‘n’ grabed the axel in the middle of them spinnin’ blades. They lifted him right up and he started flyin’ all over, hoot’n’ and hollerin’ and makin’ all kindsa fuss.

Weren’t long before Ma an’ Auntie Sue came outa the house in their nightclothes. They yelled at Jimmy and told him to come down from there. Aunt Sue told Ma she musta’ mixed the antidote all wrong. Ma just shook her head and clickt her tongue.

‘Bout a week or so later Jimmy had babies. Sure looked like the Devil’s work to me. Guess Ma and Aunt Sue didn’t do noth’n cuz they said it was nice to see a man have to do some of the motherin’ fer once. They had all sorts a tenticals and feelers and what not, but if we tried to say somethin’ about it to Jimmy he’d get real sore at us and start makin’ the tea saucers fly around the house after us. All he wanted to do was sit there and nurse them critters. He made us go to the store to buy him all sorts a queer foods, like: donuts, and candy, and arisall, and brockolee, and twinkies.

After a month or two, them critters had growed pretty big. ‘Ventually, they just flew away. Jimmy started to go back to normal mostly after that. He says he always feels a little empty since they gone away. He always wears them sad eyebrows and that pouty frown. Ma and Auntie just act like nothin’ ever happened and the government came and picked up that thing in ar yard a year or two ago.

He don’t need the remote to change the channels on the teevee though. I think that’s pretty neat.